Sunday, August 22, 2010

Long Time no Post

2 weeks.  Wow.  Long time no post.

My life is so boring I haven't felt the need to even put down in words what's been going on.  Joe did not get any of the jobs he interviewed for.  I spend my time either crying about it or having complete and total panic attacks.  Neither are fun, for me or for Joe.  I have to admit I am losing hope that he will find a job. Like, ever.  I do realize how silly it is to think something like that but you have your spouse go 19 months without a job and then tell me how you feel about it. It is disheartening, to say the least.

I'm one of those people who likes to have something to look forward to.  A special occasion.  A holiday. A trip.  A concert.   Something. Well we've got nothing and  haven't for a while and it's bumming me out.  I have a couple of days off(a few actually) at the end of August and I had hoped to make it up North to see my sees-ter and my Nor Cal blogging buddies but it isn't going to happen.  It's just not in the budget right now.  I am sad and disappointed about it.   

I'm ready for summer to be over.  We have been incredibly lucky with the weather here and it has been a very cool summer but in the last week it has begun to heat up.  I hate heat.  Blech.  It's too hot to go walking so I end up sitting inside on the couch for long stretches of time.  Not helpful for my negative frame of mind.  We have made it to the pool to exercise a couple of times in the last week but it's such a zoo there some evenings that there is hardly room to move, let alone work out.  Plus I love Fall.  It's my favorite season.

We have really been isolating ourselves socially as well, mostly due to financial reasons.  We mostly keep to ourselves, and stay home and shy away from being other people.  Not that we have that many friends to begin with.  We don't really have any "couples" friends that we can hang out with.  We talk all the time about how we need to get out and make friends.  We would love to have a group of people to get together with and watch movies, or play board games with.  The question is, how do we do that?  Where does a couple in their 40's(almost), married, with no kids go to find friends?  The bar?  The bowling alley?   The park? We live in an apartment so we don't even have the whole "neighborhood" aspect.  No block parties and such.  It's hard for us to meet new people.

How do you meet new friends? I think having children makes it easier, as you have other parents at your child's school/daycare, etc., plus birthday parties and such.

Today is turning out to be another lazy day.  We are committed to get out and go for a walk later after it cools down and I have some laundry to do but other than that, nada.  Tell me something fun you are doing today. Maybe I can live vicariously though you guys.


Susan said...

We don't have a big circle of friends. Heck, those we have probably don't make up a circle. We have no one close enough to just hop in the car and go see. So, we spend a lot of time alone, too. And we have a kid. Until this year, O went to school in a town that we don't live in or near. I have a 45 mile commute each way and I put her in a school that was half way to where I worked. Everyone lived a minimum of 30-35 minutes away and no one wants to drive here to play and we didn't want to drive there, so we do a lot alone. I am moving her back to public school in the town we live in and I hope through that she can meet some kids she can meet to play with. Me? I'm semi-okay with not having a social circle that always has something going on. Her, not so much. She needs the kid interaction. So far the parents I've met are all SAHM and makes me feel uncomfortable b/c I work so many hours. This is the first time in 9 years I haven't had a second job of some sort. I lost my contract job in the winter and we're adjusting to it. Most of those I know and have become close to are bloggy buddies, but I seldom see them b/c we all live so far away. If you lived closer, y'all could come over and see how pathetic we really are :)

I hope you have a nice week and I've got you guys in my prayers.

Lots of love from the east coast....

M3 said...

Hm, I'm not sure I had any fun today, but I sure was busy. Little Ree got all teary at bedtime and said "Mama, daddy, why you didn't play with me at all today?" Ugh. And she was right. We were so busy all day that we just ignored her and her sister and expected them to be all quiet and play on their own and not bother us. Feel like a total heel. Bleh. Promised her I would do better with balance tomorrow.

Sending huge hugs to you and Joe about the jobs. It's just horrible.

2crazydogs said...

Hi Michelle,
I'm a silent reader of your blog but this post I have to put in my words. Don't lose hope, Michelle, I was in your shoes when my husband lost his job in Oct 2007 as a technician. He applied for all sorts of jobs and had interviews, too, but no luck. I was lost, thinking what else could we do to keep the house and we have 3 dogs we just cannot give up. I was at wits end....had to see the doctor for depression. We eventually lost our house to the bank in May this year. 2 weeks before we moved out without a place to go to, my husband was offered a job. Praise the Lord. Hang in there, Michelle. It's tough, I really feel for you. Also, like you we shy away from friends too and we still do because of financial reasons due to all the debt we vacations/or visit my family in Malaysia/Singapore, no eating out, zip. I am still taking one day at a time and keep praying to Jesus for strength to get us through the day. I will continue to keep you and Joe in my prayers, Michelle.

Michelle said...

Susan-I can see how it i shard to make friends with the other kid's parents if no on lives close by. We really just need to make an effort to get out more. I am so jealous every time I read on FB about someone getting together with other families in their neighborhood. Living in an apartment we don't have that at all.

2Crazydogs-thank you for sharing your story with me. Although I wouldn't with our situation on anyone, it truly helps me to know that there are other people out there who know what we are going through. I'm glad things have started to get slightly better. I'm going to try and keep some hope that things will for us as well.

Mary Mia- I just read your blog post and Holy Moly have you bee busy! Good luck with the house. That is a huge undertaking with two little ones running around(one in a cast!)

Kayce said...

I so wish we could figure a way to get you guys up here! We thought we were going to make it down there for Labor Day weekend but it's not in the budget for us. So I'll have to look at some future dates to get back down to you and give you a big hug! Seriously place to stay, I'm not a half bad cook and I've got a warm bed for you guys! We could make some serious fun. HUGS to you my friend.

Number 6 and no more counting! said...

chin up girl friend. things have gotta change for you soon.

This is a long funk for you both and I am hoping/wishing/prayer that things take a turn around.


Donna said...

Most of my friends are down where you live! I don't see them more than once per year so I know something about how you're feeling. We do live in a house but we don't know our neighbors. It's just not that kind of neighborhood. We've been here for four years and I can't tell you the names of more than two people on our street.

Maybe Joe could volunteer? It would keep his work history current and give him something to look forward to each day. It's a good way to make new friends too. The list of volunteer opportunities is endless.

Wish we lived closer. Most of my best friends are in another zip code. :(

Our Blog: Double Happiness!

Shannon said...

I know what you mean about a social neighborhood. My neighborhood is FULL of families with kids and since we don't have any yet we don't feel very connected. There are lots of ways to meet people locally though. Have you tried You type in some interests and tons of meetups pop up where you can go meet up with like minded peeps. I bet if you googled social club and your city you'd find lots of stuff (I know CLT has tons and we aren't near as big as your area). xoxo

Shannon said...

Also, check this out:

I don't know your county. THey have an adoption section and you can join without having your kid home yet. You'll meet other adoptive moms to be!