Friday, September 21, 2012


This week has been crappy.  Truly bad.

Some stuff at work that isn't a big deal but I overthink it and make it a big deal to me.  I hate that I do that. I wish I could stop doing that.

I haven't been feeling well.  I thought for sure I was coming down with something. Sore throat, runny nose, extra tired, but then I woke up this morning and felt better.  Those are classic symptoms of my kidney disease, which means I am probably having a flare up.  They usually last between three and  five days.  I may need to get some extra sleep this weekend.  I have also been fighting a migraine for about 5 days now and that is exhausting.  Blah.

I got a new tire for my car, only to find out I need two  more.  The guy gave me a great deal, thanks to my friend Carla, and I know he isn't fishing for a sale(or he would have told me I needed three more instead of just two), but I was only expecting to purchase one new tire, not three so I am kind of stressed out over how I am going to pay for that.  It has to be a priority though because one of them is  in just as bad shape as the one I replaced but I couldn't see it until the tire guy turned the wheel a certain way and pointed it out to me.


I'm still feeling homesick.  Does that make any sense to anyone? In a way it feelsl like I have been on vacation, or just visiting a friend and eventually I will go back home. To my apartment.  And my dog.  And my husband.   Even though most of my stuff is in my room at this place.  It's still not my home.  Yet.  Hopefully one day it will feel like it but it doesn't yet.

I cried about my dog(again) on the way to work.

I'm starting to sound like a broken record, I know.  I miss my home, I miss my dog, I miss my husband.  Wah.  All of this is almost too  much for me to handle.

I had a friend on facebook tell me that sometimes all you can do is just show up.

Forgive me, but that's about all I am managing to do right now.  Just show up.  Get out of bed everyday and do the best I can, even on the days(or weeks) that  I feel like it's more than I can handle.

I am so glad tomorrow is friday.  Of course I am always glad that it is Friday, but especially so this week.

Someone wrote me a very nice e-mail last week about my situtation and how they can relate and I lost it.  I want to respond but I can't for the life of me find that email.  If you are reading this, can you send me another email at scrapper(dot)michelle(at)  I will be phasing out the china adopter email and I really wanted to respond to what you wrote.  I wanted to thank you for the kind words too.

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