Saturday, December 29, 2007

Feeling Overwhelmed

The first two days of watching the kids went very smoothly. Well I guess that was the honeymoon period, because it is only 9:30 and I am feeling stressed out and overwhelmed. The day started with arguing(Cameron). And then yelling(Me). And being sent to his room(Cameron). And then some tears(both of us). It is raining and I don't know what we're going to do today. Joe got to sleep until 9:00. I made a huge breakfast, but I was so busy cooking and serving everybody else that by the time it was my turn to eat there were no more hash browns and my food was cold. I really wanted those hash browns. I'm trying to take care of two adults(my Dad is with us) and two children and two dogs and a cat. Our dog keeps nipping at the kids and chasing their cat. Their dog hates our dog and spends the majority of the day growling at her. I'm trying to keep our dog away from their cat and their dog, while keeping her away from the kids. I have cleaned the whole upstairs at least three times, but no matter how many times I do the dishes or vacuum, there are always dishes in the sink and things that need vacuuming. I'm tired. Did I mention this is my vacation? The only one I get. Don't get me wrong. I offered to do this. I'm not blaming anyone. I want to spend quality time with my niece and nephew. I don't get to see them as much as I would like. But I'm thinking maybe next year Joe and I plan a little trip of our own. Even if it is a weekend trip. Sometimes I wonder if I can do this. The lack of sleep. The constant mess. Everybody wanting something from me. All the time. It's different when it's your own kid, right?

P.S. I'm so tired of hearing things like "Welcome to my World". Or "You're so lucky you don't have kids. See how hard it is?" Or "Are you sure you want to have children of your own? You're pretty stressed out." These aren't my children. This isn't my house. Or my animals. Or my car. Why don't you try babysitting someone else's kids for five days and then see how you feel? It isn't the same as raising your own family

The babysitter is coming tonight and Joe and I are going to the movies. I know everything will be fine. I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed today. This too shall pass.


Everyone Has a Story... said...

Hang in there!
Kids have a way of finding our "buttons" especially when we are tired and stressed!

You will look back on this time, and cherish this time you spent with your neice and nephew..really!

You do have a way of telling stories...keep writing!

Signed, a mom of three teenage boys...Kim

Rebel said...

Just a little note of encouragement... I am a mother of 4... number 5 is in China waiting...I consider myself a pretty good mother... especially when I am not on the computer waiting for my little one in China! :) But... add another child... a family member's little one or a friend... and it is like adding 12 more!!! Yes, it is very different when they are not yours and not part of the normal routine! I promise you will figure out your normal with your little girl when she comes and all will be great! Don't you worry!!!


redmaryjanes said...

Sounds hectic girl! Hang in there.

M3 said...

Hi Michelle, hang in there!

It *is* different when they're your own kiddos, but (I hate to say this, and I'm qualifying it by saying that this is just my opinion) I don't know that it's any easier. It took Rod and I hours to clean up the house after the kids went to bed the other night (we were like silent robots just shoveling things out), they can push my buttons like no one else, and there are (many many) times when I have to go in the office and just breathe deeply for a few minutes. It's hard. Really hard, at least for me. But it's balanced by moments of such love and beauty that it can bring you to your knees. Doesn't make it any easier, but makes it worth anything.

M3 said...

Oh, I forgot to mention -- my perspective is coming from having two-year-olds. That's all the experience I have, they probably get easier as they get older. Right? I'm sure they do... They do! (repeating to myself emphatically)

Julie said...

Hang in there, hope you enjoyed your evening out!

Brandi said...

Well, I'm a little late posting, but just wanted to say I totally understand how you're feeling.

Parenting is HARD work. There is always somebody wanting something, there is always something to clean (even after you just cleaned it 10 minutes ago), there is always someplace you're supposed to be (15 minutes ago), or something you were supposed to send somewhere (that you just learned about 5 minutes ago). But there is NOTHING like it. All those moments when you just want to scream and yell and give up...those all go away when they do something so totally unexpected & sweet. Parenting is THE BEST job in the whole wide world!

My step-daughter has been with us for the last 2 weeks...and, while she's a pretty good kid, she's not mine. And I don't mean that in a bad way...I just mean that she doesn't know my rules...what I expect, how she should act, how I should act, etc... It's TOTALLY different (and very stressful) taking care of a child that is not your own.

Hang in there. You'll be a wonderful mother! Don't worry!