Sunday, October 21, 2007

There is a large fire burning pretty close to my house. The smoke and ashes are terrible. The smell is overwhelming. I closed all of the windows, but it still smells like a campfire in our living room. Joe said I should try and pretend we are camping. He's a funny guy, my husband. I know we are not in any real danger, but it is scary. I pray no firefighters are injured or houses lost. It may affect my commute tomorrow, as the toll road I take to work is closed at the moment. I wish the wind would stop. Other than that, it was a nice day. I had breakfast with two of my friends that I met through an infertility support group I attended two summers ago. There were five of us originally. One girl got pregnant and dropped out(her loss), two became preganant after IVF, and the other one is pursuing domestic adoption. Only the three of us live locally still, and we try to get together every three or four months or so. Jenny has the handsomest little boy, and Lynn has the cutest little baby girl I have ever met. I would post pictures, but I don't have permission and I won't post pictures of other people's children without their consent. You'll just have to take my word for it. Extreme cuteness. I managed to shake off the insecurity and negative vibe I had from the last two days of work. My motto this week is going to be "Suck it up." Oh yeah, and "Stop making stupid mistakes". Hope your Sunday was good.


Anonymous said...

Hi Michelle, it's Kerry (the "dropout" for the rest of you reading). I'm really sorry that you still seem to have some bitterness at my decision to leave the group. I did not intend to hurt anyone's feelings; I was only following my own heart. I think you need to remember that not all people experiencing infertility react the same way to every situation. Please remember that I suffered through 4 miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy that left me unable to get pregnant except through ivf. When I finally got pregnant after 3 rounds of ivf, I made the decision to leave the group. I did so because it was very uncomfortable for me to be pregnant while the rest of you were still struggling. I felt guilty and questioned why me and not the rest of you. I am incredibly happy for both Jenny and Lynne (as I have personally let them know), and I look forward to the day that I read about Sophie's homecoming on your blog. Good luck.

Michelle said...

Hi Kerry. Wow, I had no idea you still followed my blog. I guess the comment that I made about you dropping out being your loss could come across as bitter, but I didn't really think of it like that when I wrote it. But I could see how it came across that way. You didn't just drop out of the group, you kind of fell off of the face of the earth. You even stopped responding to my e-mails. It felt like you had gotten what you needed from the group, and as soon as you acheived pregnancy, you didn't need us anymore. It seemed rather selfish at the time. I joined that group because I wanted to make connections with other women that would continue on throughout parenting(as I have with both Jenny and Lynn). To be honest, aside from the comment yesterday, I don't think about you all that much and I don't hold any bitterness toward you. I wish you well, as I did when you were in the group. Sorry if that comment came across as bitter. I hope you and your little boy are doing well. Take care.