Tuesday, July 08, 2008

1 year

1 year ago today we lost our Tess.

I still miss her so much. Sometimes I think it is not normal for me to still miss her this much. I thought we would have another dog by now. I still feel like maybe a small part of the empty place in my heart would be filled with the love for another dog. I think I have been waiting for some sort of sign and there just hasn't been one. I scour the internet rescue sites, as well as the animal shelters and craig's list, hoping one will jump out at me or "speak" to me. But it hasn't happened. There have been a few that caught my eye, but Joe wasn't sure. I think that is really what is keeping us from getting one. We just can't agree. He wants a puppy. I want an older dog. I want a big dog(we already have a small dog). He wants a "medium sized dog". He wants a dog with short hair. I am open to any length hair. We did have a Lab whose shedding was out of control and it was a pain, so I can see his reasoning there. What he really wants is either an English Bulldog puppy or another Viszla puppy. Besides not being able to afford either of these, a Viszla puppy is pretty much out of the question due to the fact that they are extremely hyper until the age of 5 and we live in an apartment. Our Tess had a large yard during her puppy years and was almost 7 years old before we moved her into an apartment. I have checked the English Bulldog rescue sites(repeatedly)and they either don't have any puppies, or they are very strict about where they place the dogs. They don't allow other dogs in the home, or children(most times), and they often won't place in an apartment. So I guess we'll just continue with the one dog for now. I told myself that it was for the best, as we were going to have a child here eventually and 1 dog is certainly easier than 2. But as time goes by I realize I have put so much of my life on hold because of this adoption. Realistically, we have another 2 year wait ahead of us and I'm tired of living my life on hold. I want to live it.


Kylie's momma said...

Hi Michelle, Sorry about your dog woes in trying to agree on a new one. Keep looking...you'll know it's the one when you see it. Way to go about the dragon boat races I AM IMPRESSED! Have a GREAT day off tomorrow!
PS> TAG you're it!

OH MY #6 said...

You know there is something good about knowing whats right and maybe, just maybe, thats whats going on. I am a firm believe in our, sense of self, and maybe thats whats going on. YOU will know when the time is right.

I think what your feeling is pretty normal as far as being on hold with the whole adoption thing. I have to remind myself of that all the darn time.

I think it is awesome that you keep your Tess close to your heart. when it is time to let go you will.

Have a good one my friend.